Provide the people of that building a soothing living environment.”

The thesis paper must be original research with a narrow focus (not a large book topic).The topic for this paper is Architectural Computation and Design.

I have a draft; please see attachment for my draft. The paper needs to rewrite since professor is not happy with my draft because the topic is too general. The paper needs to have a thesis statement – something arguable, that you’re going to “prove” (although research is a part of that). The more specific = the better.
Please read all the feedbacks on my outline and draft, and refine the thesis paper according to the comments.

Introduction: Thesis Position
Body: Arguments
The introduction needs to be specific: what is your thesis position that you are trying to address?
The body is to have ideas that support the thesis statement and is basically the arguments for the paper. I have already layout the structure for the body in my outline. Please follow the ideas in my outline.

Important Notes:
1. If your idea isn’t focused it’s easy to go well over this, writing in circles. Don’t do that. The thesis paper needs to be specific on one small area and persuade your thesis statement in the body paragraph.

2. Give credit where it is due and cite all direct quotes. But cobbling together properly cited quotes does not a paper make: at least 80-90% should be your original words. Use footnotes to accomplish this or to expand on any “sidebar” ideas.

3. You can list a few figures or charts to clarify your ideas (figure 1, figure 2, figure 3 and so on) at the end of the paper. When you are referring to a figure in the body paragraph, you can put (see figure 1), for example. The idea is very clear this way (use illustrations to add interest and make points). But, make sure you give source credit to all illustrations, even if you made things yourself.

4. Fourth, the body needs a stronger standpoint in order to persuade the reader that your thesis statement is valid (see my outline for ideas). The thesis statement need some work (please see my draft), as stated in the introduction: “If the computations and design is perfect to implement the construction of building according to requirement, the people belonging to that particular building will feel much relax and comfort to live in it and this combination of computations and design can provide the people of that building a soothing living environment.” The paper needs to argue why the thesis statement is valid in the body paragraph (stronger arguments but focus). Don’t go far beyond the topic.

The requirements for the paper are below. The thesis needs to refine and narrow down to only focus or explore on a specific idea in depth in order to have a concrete argument that someone could agree or disagree with. You can think this as a persuasive paper to argue that the thesis is valid, instead of research paper, although it requires some research. Let me know if you have any questions. Thanks

In order to have some knowledge to write this paper, I have attached some course readings that are related to this paper (please see attachments).

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